There’s a cultural meme that single mothers are noble, hardworking martyrs deserving of love and affection for their sacrifice to society. The reality is far from that.

Dating single mothers is like panning for gold in a puddle of shit.

“I don’t need no man/we were doing fine before you showed up.”

Being a strong, smart, independent and in control woman is great for career development and mental health and even creating a stable environment to raise your crotch fruit. But sorry girls, it’s not sexy. At all.

Real men are attracted to vulnerable, submissive women.

Stretch marks and cracked nipples.

Witnessing the aftermath of a girl with a rocking body go through pregnancy and give birth is like watching your favorite pub burn to the ground. Postpartum bodies are the things that nightmares are made of.

She’ll eventually treat you like just another kid.

All is not lost for the single mother looking for love. There is a breed of male that won’t just pump and dump them, but will get involved with them long term with the eventual view to putting a ring on it.

The fact that they’re raising someone else’s kid? No problem!

The fact that the kids are her top priority and he is dead last? No problem!

I don’t have a name for these guys (yet) but they’re directionless, weak willed and usually unable to support themselves. Meeting a woman that has raised one or more kids on her own is a godsend for these guys because their basically searching for a replacement Mommy. I see this shit all the time.

With one or more kids in the house demanding her attention, asking to be fed and crazing emotional support, adding a broken man-child to the mix is like adding just other kid. It’s a marriage made in heaven.

Even if you’re not that guy, she’ll try and turn you into him if you stick around too long. Before you know it, she’ll be baby talking you, dictating your movements, telling you off for being “naughty” and emasculating you to the point where she may has well have cut your balls off to keep in her purse.

Brain death from watching Frozen 500+ times. 

Kids make you boring. Young, childfree girls at at that awesome point in their lives where they’re unsure about the world and are still testing their limits. They’re fun and spontaneous and for older guys like me, that vibe is infectious.

Single mothers on the other hand, rarely drink, don’t go out much (how can they?) and don’t have any opinions beyond the cost of daycare and “cute” things that Bratleigh did today at school. To avoid scaring you away, they’ll initially try and shield you from any talk about their spawn, but with nothing else to talk about, it’ll eventually slip through.

Why?

I’m in my mid thirties now and while I prefer to date childfree girls under 25, that’s not always possible. An easy lay from a single mother is still an easy lay and I’m not opposed to a little dumpster diving from time to time if it helps break a cold streak.

If you find yourself facing a sure thing from a women with kids, hook up with them for a couple of weeks max. Try not to fuck in the same house as the kid is sleeping and never sleep over at her place.

I speak from experience. This was a few years ago and I was dating a 25yo “artist” with two kids (from two different Dads). She had a pretty rocking body as she’d popped the brats out in her teens so avoided the stretch marks for the most part.

After several Saturday nights of staying over at her place, I found myself waking up crazy early around 6am. We were in the mood so I thought I’d initiate a little morning sex before I got the fuck out of there. I hear the kids downstairs playing quietly, but she assures me everything is cool. Cut to ten minutes later and she’s silently bouncing on top of me while, trying to hold it together while I’m working on her clit.

Suddenly, the door bursts open, with a cry of, “Mummy!” She freaks out, sliding up off my cock but not before the kid clocks me and shouts, “I’ve got poo on my hands!”, rushing towards the bed with the evidence in his grasp.

I dodged the shitty grenade, got dressed and left so fast you’d thought I was Usain Bolt.